Portraits of Neighbours

Portrait of Neighbours was born out of the urge to paint portraits in an abstract manner, mostly because I don’t know how to paint a portrait. I want to make sure that the background was black, and that everything else was a mix of colours.

In 2018— two years before the global pandemic, I sat at the back in a room full of relatives. It was Eid day 2. Over the past years, I found Eid Al-Fitr celebration was a stage of showing off, decorated with force forgiveness and superficial connection. I hardly understand it in its essence. Forgiveness becomes a formality and obligation which we have to require for the sake of tradition, not as a truth which we carry in our hearts. From that, I continually found myself both as an observer and a player who played fake during those days. I know very well there is a lot of homework I need to observe and heal for the underlying traumas that are connected with those. But here I want to deconstruct and remap my pessimism toward human relationships which I found uncomfortable during the Eid season in a form of art. What does it mean to be human among families? Why do we call them family and others as stranger, friends, and neighbours, what is the standards and variables to label us and them with those, Is it by blood, distance, by honesty? And if those label put us in a room of relation then why must we compete among each other— your lack is my gain, your insecurity is my weapon. Aren't we tired of all those superficial connections and affection, and for once longing for honesty and pure connections? Or is it perhaps my views that are fragmented, building a narrative from what I want to look at: the hate, the fake, the betrayal?

Portrait of Neighbours was born to observe those narratives, to challenge the fragmented-incomplete information that is laid in front of us using portraits as a tool: what we see in the face of others. The human portrait is the first layer which holds its facade and its rawness. It is fragile and uncomfortable to face. How we face disappointment, how we face sadness and grief, Isn't it safer to face their mask, their wall, their temple and play around in the ground of pretense? 

Portrait of Neighbours begins with a question: Where should we look at the other portrait? and then how do we act according to that— which is of course our personal homework. It was made in the hope to train myself: to observe and connect to each other beyond the pretense to find a common ground for understanding. Though in this case, I know that the understanding will be one-sided. And it is enough since it can reduce the war I had inside.

When I sat with relatives during Eid celebration, I could see their backs and their faces, overlapping. 

back to back, front to back.

backs, and faces.

Note: PON was made in 2018-2019 but never had a chance to bloom. I made it in the form of a book, hoping that one day they can fly, and if not then I hope this blog can give her justice.

September 2022

Ifada